Plumber's Butt

As happens when getting older, the conversation meanders around to health issues. On a recent evening it did just that. Several of us just had or were anticipating colonoscopies.
The protocol is to have someone else drive you and check you in as they do not want you driving home alone afterwards due to the anesthesia.
You spend the day before the procedure drinking drain cleaner and staying very close to the bathroom. Everything is to be sparkling clean for the snakey camera.
The instructions advise to 'leave plenty of extra time for getting there in case you have to stop and relieve yourself on the way over.'  Now, seriously, what to they mean by that?


    PASSENGER:   "Pull over NOW!!!"
   Breaks are slammed on, car stops and passenger jumps out hurriedly and goes about his business.
   DRIVER:  "WHAT ARE YOU DOING????  THIS IS A BUSY STREET!!!!"
   PASSENGER:  "Oh, that's okay if it's BUSY, dear, no worries; we left with PLENTY of extra time for getting there."


And, bottom line, (pun intended)  who goes into this profession???


    One medical student trying to hit on a hot new First Year student: 
  HE:  "So, what specialty are you going into?"
  SHE:  (thinking he's kind of cute) "Oh, brain surgery or maybe electrocardiology.  What about you?"
  HE:   "I'm gonna check out butts; you know, do colon safaris, lasso some polyps, that sort of thing."
  SHE:  "Oh................. I have to go--I have some plans that I haven't made yet, that I am very late for."
 ©3/2012  Jana B Patrick