Sheer Madness

I just got my hair cut in a retro look--longer in front and shorter in back--like a bubble head Barbie from the 60's.  It is a haircut I really wanted the first time it was popular when I was in 6th grade.  Instead, my five sisters and I got the Scotch Tape treatment. Tape was laid on horizontally across one's bangs. ('fringe' to my British friends)  Mothers would cut the hair straight across under the tape.  Our mom, presumably to make this chore only come around every 6 months, would cut ABOVE the tape.  One inch bangs were NOT in style.


So, while our mom and dad were gone one night,  my sister Jackie (12) and I (11) decided to give the cool new bubble hairdo to our sister Betsy (7).  Trustingly naive, she climbed up on a high stool; Jackie started in with the scissors on one side and I on the other... we met in two different places in back.  "No problem," I said, and ran to get the electric clippers. (Used by my dad to give my brother the 'Army Recruit' look when all other males had the 'Jesus' look)  Explaining that I would feather the back, I attached a long comb to the clippers. Holding them at the wrong angle, with the first swipe I gave the lower back of Betsy's head a quarter sized bald spot.  My solution was to shave off a one inch band across the whole back of her head...which became a two inch band when we tried to feather again.  We ditched that idea and blunt cut her thick hair above so it sat like a horizontal shelf overlooking a wasteland of stubble. Betsy walked around for at least a month with shoulders scrunched and head tilted up. Boys at school came up behind and said, "Betsy Buzz Buzzzzzzzzzzz!!!"
Naturally, siblings were equally wicked.


With 7 kids, I don't believe our mom and dad even noticed.  Betsy grew up without therapy and is currently sporting the same hairdo we had attempted to give her in 1968. This time, it looks good.
©6/2011  Jana B Patrick