GPS

The lady's electronic voice on our GPS system recently helped us reach Dubuque, Iowa.  Perhaps it's time for the market to come up with more voice variety for this ingenious device.


The Guy Electronic voice version:  "Hey bud!  Hang a ralph up by da Fleet Farm, go about twenny more yards and dere's da Denny's you're looking for.  Have a nice day!"


The Backseat Driver version:  "In a quarter mile, take a right turn...Hey!  Why did you go straight?!  It's much shorter the other way--why don't you ever listen to me?!  For Pete's sake, slow down!! And quit fiddling with the GPS and watch the road!  Oh, the trials I have to go through."  
(Steve says I should do the voice for this GPS...)

The Republican version:  "In a quarter mile, take a right turn.  Take the next right turn.  In one mile take a right turn..."  When buying this model, a 37% surcharge is kicked back to the corporate lobbyists of your choice.

The subsidized Democratic version costs less and you may even be entitled to own one for free.  Only left turns are directed.
Both party's devices include State as well a a new Federal sales tax and promise to keep you spinning your wheels.
©10/2011  Jana B Patrick